A 10 year old boy in Kent was traumatised by events that occurred at school on Tuesday afternoon. The boy in question was about to start his lunch time snack when he was forced to leave the school canteen by an irate teacher. He was made by staff to remove, all that was deemed to be unsuitable from his Jade Goody lunch box. It was claimed that the Headmaster when questioned on the matter, said that the food inside the pupil’s lunch box was far too unhealthy.

Young Liam O’Brien was made to eat the food in the headmaster’s room away from his friends. The school confirmed any future items of food deemed to be unhealthy would be confiscated if found to break the schools rules.
Liam’s father, Michael 41, said yesterday: “It’s outrageous. It has become an obsession with the school. They are acting like the Gestapo. They have no right to check a child’s lunchbox even worse confiscate its contents. Liam was ordered out of the canteen in front of his friends and it’s left him feeling very scared. He was told that an apple, a natural yogurt, a sandwich (wholemeal) and low fat spread were far too unhealthy for a child his age. Liam is currently being fed at school on a diet of turkey twisters, chips and suet pudding and all manner of so called healthy foods.”
Last night the Headmaster, Mr Ainsley Harriot said, “Liam’s packed lunch was in breach of the guidelines issued by the Education Department. Because of changes in the diet of the pupils an improvement in class behaviour is already evident.”

We asked Mr Harriot to provide an example of any change in the children’s behaviour. He confirmed, “before the change in diet the children used to be polite always did as they were told. It was so bad the children wouldn’t even give the teachers names. Since the changes in the rules one teacher was abused verbally another was asked if they were a virgin as they were a fat bitch. At last we are getting back to basics.” We can confirm that whilst giving the interview at the school gates, Mr Harriot was in fact called a paedophile by an innocent looking child at the school. Whether this was anything to do with the changes in food or not we are unable to confirm.

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