U2 Singer Bono In Ego Boosting Surgery

SINGER BONO was rushed to hospital for emergency ego surgery yesterday – casting doubts over U2’s Glastonbury headline spot.

The chart-topping group have cancelled the first date of their US tour after the frontman sustained a lack of egotism during rehearsals.

Bono’s injury comes barely four weeks before U2 play the Somerset festival for the first time on June 25.

A band spokesman said the Irish star, 50 – real name PAUL HEWSON – will spend the next few days in hospital in Munich, Germany. He will be given intense ego boosting treatment to get him back to his usual sanctimonious ego indulgent self.

He added: “Once his condition has been assessed further, a statement will be made regarding the impact on forthcoming tour dates.”

The band have already postponed their Salt Lake City gig in Utah.

Paul McGuinness – who manages the band said: “We hope to get things resolved as soon as possible. Life hasn’t been the same in the band since Bono lost the ability to irritate the life out of everyone. He almost looks smaller than his former self. I have checked his built up heels on his boots and they are fine, it has to be his shrunken over inflated head that makes him appear smaller!”

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  1. […] U2 Singer Bono In Ego Boosting Surgery В« THE RANK NEWS: spoof news … May 23, 2010 … SINGER BONO was rushed to hospital for emergency ego surgery yesterday … Filed under bono, cancelled tour dates, … bin the knife, bingo wings, bingu wa mutharika ….. stock market crash, stolen, stone hendge, storks … […]

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