Daily Mail and Daily Express To Run Out Of Nazi Stories Within 12 Months


Both the Daily Express and Daily Mail newspapers will run out of Nazi wartime stories to fill its weekend editions within the next 12 months experts claim. The newspapers which regale over stories of Hitler and his SS henchmen each weekend are at crisis point we have been reliably informed. The situation came to a head when it was realised that no new stories of sex, drugs and witchcraft within the Nazi regime would be available to write about after 2010.Harry McCarthy a leading expert on the matter confirmed that the well has very nearly run dry. “For years the papers have had a vast library of information to fall back on, unfortunately, this is far from the case now. You only have to feel sorry for the next generation of children who may be denied the knowledge of the swastika as a symbol of terror.”

Headlines like, “Hitler My Secret Toby Jug Collection” and “Adolf Baked Swastika Treats For Eva!” just haven’t been the sure fired winner they had expected them to be Daily Express reader Albert Eickmen confirmed. “How do they expect me to keep hold of my right-wing tendencies and feelings on immigration etc when they are falling short on the usual Nazi goodies I have come to rely on each weekend?”

Some experts are calling this an even bigger crisis than global warming itself and can only see dark skies ahead. Sir Henry Althorn was shocked upon hearing the news, “If this is true and the Conservatives don’t continue in power for longer than five years I will be sending very strong words to the letters pages to both these damn newspapers, be warned!”

Hitler 1000 years of Glorious Party Cooking – On Sale at the Daily Mail online book stores today.

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