David Miliband Quits Shadow Cabinet Over Angel Delight Snub

  David Miliband has announced today that he is not prepared to serve under his brother Ed and that he intends to retire from front-line Labour politics. The Shadow Foreign Secretary, who had been the overwhelming favourite to win the Labour leadership race right up until last Saturday, denied that his decision was a personal reaction … Continue reading

News In Brief:Bed Bugs Eating In Tonight

Ainsworth, Nebraska: That group of bed bugs Peter Abramovich has tried to ignore all week are sure looking forward to spending some more quality time with him when he turns in for the night. From his deluxe King Sized bed they watch in anticipation as the reluctant Mr Abramovich slowly slipped between the luxury fitted sheets for … Continue reading

Americans To Give Up Cancer Treatment After Presidential Quote

Americans have welcomed a quote by President Obama in the book ‘Obama’s War’ by Bob Woodward Washington Post Staff Writer, in which he confirmed where the cancer is. ‘We need to make it clear… the cancer is in Pakistan’ Maurine Swartz, a 43 year-old mother of three from Fort Wayne, Indiana welcomed the news after recent … Continue reading

Newspaper Readers Shocked At Immigrant Burial

Both Daily Mail and Daily Express readers were shocked today to find that the body recently found by archaeologists near Stonehenge was not of British extraction. A million visitors from around the world flock to Stonehenge every year. But the monument’s status as an international attraction is nothing new. Yesterday scientists said the stones were attracting overseas tourists … Continue reading

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