Newspaper Readers Shocked At Immigrant Burial

boys body found at stonehengeBoth Daily Mail and Daily Express readers were shocked today to find that the body recently found by archaeologists near Stonehenge was not of British extraction.

A million visitors from around the world flock to Stonehenge every year. But the monument’s status as an international attraction is nothing new.

Yesterday scientists said the stones were attracting overseas tourists thousands of years ago – after discovering that a Bronze Age teenage boy buried there around  1550 BC grew up in the Mediterranean.

The boy – aged 14 or 15 – had travelled to Britain from Spain, Italy, Greece or France, crossing the English Channel in a primitive wooden boat, they said. He was placed in a simple grave alongside an amber necklace just a mile from the stone circle.

Ardent Daily Express reader Arthur Shawcross was livid upon hearing the news, ” This just typifies how the former Labour government has brought our Nation to its knees. They have not only allowed immigrants to come over here and take our jobs but they were also allowing them to bury their ancient ancestors here too!”

Mary Bell, 58 year-old from Shoreditch was dumbfounded when hearing the news. “I am so angry over this, its put me off completing the daily Sudoku puzzle in my newspaper. Surely this shouldn’t have been allowed I always thought Stonehenge looked like an expensive palace. They probably had immigrants living a life of luxury whilst normal folks had to live in common a garden mud huts, shame on you Tony Blair!”

British National Party leader, Nick Griffin has called for an enquiry into the matter.

” This has to stop and I call upon all Daily Express and Daily Mail readers as well as any ancient indigenous people who may have lived 3000 years ago to join our campaign against these illegal immigrants darkening our ancient doorsteps!”

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