News In Brief: Odd Bins Go Into Administration

New Riots Expected After Arts Funding Cuts Announced

The Metropolitan Police have confirmed that they are on high alert after news broke today that more than 200 organisations that received regular funding from Arts Council England have missed out after “a series of painful decisions”. Fears that thousands of mime anarchists will march on the capital this weekend as the news sinks in … Continue reading

Angels Are Perverts Claim Women

Angels are more likely to visit young single women on their own according to biblical leaders. In a recent survey, Angels, it can be confirmed are more likely to visit young, single females and largely shun older women as a consequence. This news has shocked religious leaders particularly due to the sexual vulnerability of the … Continue reading

The Rank News Weekly Horoscopes 28 March 2011

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The Rank News Magazine 25 March 2011

The Rank NewsMagazine full to the brim with news, reviews and celebrity gossip   Related Articles The Rank News Weekend Magazine Out Now (ranknews.wordpress.com) Celebrity Gossip (benrosier.wordpress.com) SNL Skit: Canadian Celebrity Gossip Show (shoppingblog.com) The Rank News Magazine Out Now (ranknews.wordpress.com) This Week in the News (March 25, 2011) (sleeplessparent.wordpress.com)

Eric Pickles Confused Over Libyan Fly Zone

Eric Pickles MP, Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government voiced his concerns over the news of a continuing No Pie Zone by NATO forces in Libya this week. Upon Hearing that he had made a mistake he quickly ordered 25 steak and Kidney Pies and a half-dozen Scotch Pies to celebrate. (Original Idea … Continue reading

Cartoon:Tuition Fee Protest

UK student tuition fee protesters kettled by Metropolitan Police (cartoon)

Weekly Horoscopes 21 March 2011

The Stair Bath By ANL Productions

Ever felt the need to wash when you are on a long journey up your stairs?Ever wanted to remove the daily grime whilst it takes 5 hours to get to the top of your stairs? Then look no further! The Stair Bath gives you peace of mind should your colostomy bag get snagged on your … Continue reading

Libyan Leader Entertains Loyal Troops

Colonel Gaddafi rewarded his loyal troops last weekend with his legendary Tommy Cooper routine it has been reported. It has been confirmed that anyone who still wanted to live declared how they loved the show, well at least until the guns aimed at them were eventually lowered. The ageing leaders version of Tommy Coopers famous … Continue reading

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