Piers Morgan’s To Star In Britain’s Got No Driving Talent

Britain’s Got Talent judge Piers Morgan has said he deserved a “God damn good thrashing from the courts” after being fined for speeding in Brighton. The 45-year-old was caught by a fixed speed camera in Preston Road on 13 November doing 51mph in a 30mph zone. It happened after he had judged a so called … Continue reading

G20 Police Recruitment Poster Withdrawn After Error Found

Dog Report Urges Healthy Breeding

The Global News Terrorists At The Movies

I know what you’re thinking. “Did he eat six or only five?” Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a £1.80 Magnum, the creamiest ice cream in the world, and would blow your mind with one lick, you’ve got to ask … Continue reading

New Robocop movie runs into budget difficulties

Man Admits Having Sex With Cars

Edward Smith, who lives with his current “girlfriend” – a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla ( who he claims has a tight exhaust), insisted that he was not “sick” and had no desire to change his ways. “I appreciate beauty and I go a little bit beyond appreciating the beauty of a car only to … Continue reading

Smith Pledges More Terror Police

Armed Police Have Bird Killer In Their Sights

It has been reported that the Fazackerley Bird Killer was at long last captured by Merseyside Police yesterday morning. For nearly six months now police have been on a wild goose chase across a suburb of Liverpool trying to capture the mass murderer of countless hundreds of law abiding pigeons and other common a garden … Continue reading

Fugitive Kitten Gives Himself Up To Armed Police

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