Simon Cowell To Be Knighted For Dross On Television
Simon Cowell is to be knighted for his contribution to the puerile $hit on national and international television. The music mogul, who stars as a judge on The X Factor and Britain’s Got Talent and American Idol, was recommended by Gordon Brown before he stepped down as Prime Minister. The former Labour leader was impressed … Continue reading
Prime Minister Brown Confirms May Election
(Mr Brown shows his home to prospective buyers earlier on today.) Gordon Brown today announced a May 6th general election it was confirmed. Mr Brown’s press secretary admitted that the Prime Minister had hoped to keep hold of his Downing Street home for a little while longer. However, due to the slump in the housing … Continue reading
Government Apology Over 2 Year Delay In Condolence Letter
It was announced in parliament by Prime Minister Gordon Brown this week that a further 9, ooo soldiers will be deployed to Afghanistan in the early part of December. This would appear to be in contradiction to President Obama’s announcement that he is looking to start withdrawing American troops as early as 2010. Also this … Continue reading
The Sun No Longer Backs Gordon Brown: Other Planets Soon To Follow BBC’s Andrew Marr Confirms.
In a sudden shift of gravity the Sun newspaper has declared it no longer backs Gordon Brown and his policies. Sun readers who for years have been the cleavage between the two major political parties are up in arms over the lack of large breasted female politicians in Mr Brown’s cabinet. The owner of the … Continue reading
THE RANK NEWS: spoof news and satire 