Migrant Camps To Close In Calais And Move Closer To Britain French Minister Confirms
France has said it intends to close the camp in Calais known as “the jungle”, where migrants gather and move it to the Isle of White or possibly Dover. Immigration Minister Eric Besson told French television that the illegal gathering of tents and shelters should close imminently.The jungle has replaced official camps like Sangatte as … Continue reading
G20 Death: Sir Paul Stephenson Speaks Out
“I am utterly shocked that members of the Metropolitan Police Force have been linked to the death of Mr Ian Tomlinson. Our officers are fully trained in dealing with circumstances such as the G20 riots. As such I am shocked that members of this police force have been implicated in the untimely death of Mr … Continue reading
The Winner Of The Lights On But No One Is Home Award Goes To:-
AMY WINEO……. Miss Winehouse was seen recently carrying a lamp at a DJ gig in London. The ailing diva who is used to having the spot light on her decided it would seem to bring her own lighting just in case she was unrecognized? With an outfit like that Amy I doubt you would have … Continue reading
Durex Sponsor BIG BEN
Durex Sponsor BIG BEN.When it was pointed out that Big Ben was a Bell and not the tower erection. A spokesman commented “It sends a message”. By SLAP
Ice Cream Cone Man Arrested
An ice cream man is being questioned by the police after a spate of persistent cold selling. Mr Tony O’Brien from Pinner, London was arrested on Tuesday evening and remanded in jail following further enquiries by the police. Mr O’Brien’s solicitor confirmed that his client denies all allegations. The Metropolitan Police are looking to see … Continue reading
Tourist Flock to London Park As Pigeon Attacks Pelican
Families and tourists in a London park were left shocked when a pigeon picked up and swallowed a pelican.The unusual wildlife spectacle in St James’s Park was caught on camera by a local photographer who wishes to remain anonymous in case of reprisals by low flying pigeon gangs. He said the common or garden pigeon … Continue reading
Chelsea And Man United Come Under Scrutiny After World Record High – Five Attempt Goes Wrong
FA Probe United Star’s Chelsea Brawl FA refuse to confirm which players they have probed but will confirm that Wayne Rooney has been left with an injury. A brawl involving Manchester United players and Chelsea staff after the weekend’s title showdown is being investigated by the Football Association. What started off a world record attempt … Continue reading
THE RANK NEWS: spoof news and satire 