Margaret Thatcher : An Apology

The death of former Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher has caused a great deal of soul-searching at the Rank News. And we feel that we owe you, our loyal readers, a sincere apology. On that fateful Monday, we have to admit that we were too busy getting pissed to come up with the kind of vaguely-humourous … Continue reading

Eric Pickles Confused Over Libyan Fly Zone

Eric Pickles MP, Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government voiced his concerns over the news of a continuing No Pie Zone by NATO forces in Libya this week. Upon Hearing that he had made a mistake he quickly ordered 25 steak and Kidney Pies and a half-dozen Scotch Pies to celebrate. (Original Idea … Continue reading

Special Investigation : What Does Nick Clegg Actually Do? Secret Diaries Reveal All

With the Prime Minister David Cameron being out of the country this week as he tours the Middle East flogging shooters, the spotlight has fallen on the Deputy PM, who is supposedly ‘minding the shop’ in the meantime. Yet today it transpired that Mr. Clegg has decided to take the rest of the week off, … Continue reading

Coalition To Tackle Deficit By Going On TV Gameshows

Following the surprising news that Business Secretary Vince Cable is to appear on the Christmas special edition of the hit BBC reality show Strictly Come Dancing, we can exclusively reveal that he is not the only government minister to try his luck at TV. We have received a copy of a Top Secret memo sent by … Continue reading

Jeffrey Archer Defects To Labour Party

  Controversial Conservative peer Lord Jeffrey Archer has today announced that he is quitting the Tories and joining the Labour Party. The millionaire novelist’s shock decision is thought to have come about as a result of the news that earlier this week many backbench Labour MPs angrily attacked the Party’s Deputy Leader Harriet Harman for … Continue reading

The Sly Digs Cartoon

The Sly Digs A cartoon looking at every day life. Today we go behind the scenes of British politics.

At The Movies: Edward Scissorhands

The Rank News alternative movie posters. Today we look at this weeks Labour Party Conference and their new elected Party Leader Ed Miliband.

That Lib/Dem Manifesto Does Have A Use After All

Lib/Dem leader Nick Clegg spoke out after months of rumours that his parties manifesto was useless. After weeks of working together with the Conservative within the coalition government the Lib/Dem party have found a use for their long forgotten manifesto. Manifesto The current Deputy Prime Minister denied that this parties manifesto wasn’t nothing more than … Continue reading

Brokeback Coalition Outed By David Davis

David Cameron was last night facing a mounting backlash over his power deal with Nick Clegg after Conservative MP David Davis allegedly ridiculed the partnership as the ‘Brokeback Coalition’. The Right-winger won the private backing of some Tory MPs after reportedly comparing the link-up with the Liberal Democrats to Brokeback Mountain, the Oscar-winning film about … Continue reading

Norse God Odin To Publicly Endorse Nick Griffin’s Party

Odin god of the Norse men is due to declare the British National Party as the only party for the British Arian Right, news reports have claimed today. After a year of ups and downs the B N P has found a guardian in the shape of an ancient mythological god who truly believes in … Continue reading

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