The Rank News Magazine September Issue

The Rank News Magazine has a religious feel to it this month as we go behind the recent scenes of the controversy within the Catholic Church. Rest assured your favourite magazine is still full to the brim with its usual Gossip and Celebrity News.

Pope to Make Cheryl Cole Catholic Church’s 1st Living Saint

Pope Benedict XIV will crown his state visit to the UK next month by announcing a momentous break in tradition for the Catholic Church. For the first time in its almost 2000 year history, the Church is set to canonise a living person and that person is to be our own Angel of the North, … Continue reading

Vatican To Supply Religious Lucky Charms To MOD

Vatican we can confirm are to Supply MOD with protective rosary beads after Guardsman Glen Hockton was saved during a patrol in Afghanistan. This news has created a flood of requests from hundreds of soldiers for their own religious paraphernalia. Christian shops across the country have reported excessive sales compared to previous years and are … Continue reading

Sodano And Benedict To Form Tag Team Against Critics

Pope Pulls Plug On New Window At The Vatican

After Being Attacked By A Woman The Pope Takes Precautions

Pope Benedict Breaks Wrist: Real Reason Released

Claims of Pope Benedict’s broken wrist being due to a fall in the bath have been dismissed today as photographic evidence of the truth has been released. Pope Benedict who it was claimed had slipped in the bath has it would seem actually hurt his wrist fighting evil with martial arts. A case of candle … Continue reading

Pope Condemns Denial Of Holocaust

Early Picture of Pope Discovered

An early picture of pope Benedict XVI has been found in the cellars of what was the Hitler Youth headquarters in Berlin. The picture appears to show the young Benedict receiving the blessing of the Nazi party on his head from his local Stummpengrummpenfuher. The pope claims he has no recollection of the incident but … Continue reading

Papal Plates- What Present Did Royal Couple Give To The Pope?

Liking the obvious joke we at the GNT News Desk can only assume this!

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