X Factor Wagner ‘Booted The Queen In The Face’ Say Tabloids
The runaway star of this year’s X Factor, Wagner Fiuza-Carrilho, is said to have “shocked his fellow finalists” by kicking Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II in the face, British tabloid newspapers claimed today. The shock revelation follows several days of increasingly negative stories appearing in the popular press about the Brazilian singer. The latest claim is that the … Continue reading
X Factor Joe Comes Out while Cowell goes Cruising
X Factor winner Joe McElderry is said to be elated at the overwhelmingly positive reaction from the public to his announcement last week that he is gay. The incandescent-toothed Geordie singer said he was “blown away” by the goodwill messages he has received both from fans and fellow celebrities alike, on his Twitter feed today. … Continue reading
Simon Cowell To Be Knighted For Dross On Television
Simon Cowell is to be knighted for his contribution to the puerile $hit on national and international television. The music mogul, who stars as a judge on The X Factor and Britain’s Got Talent and American Idol, was recommended by Gordon Brown before he stepped down as Prime Minister. The former Labour leader was impressed … Continue reading
Perfect Face Dimensions Measured
Scientists believe they have worked out the dimensions of the most attractive female face.They say the key to the ideal arrangement of female facial features is the measurements between the eyes, mouth and ears. The researchers asked students to rate the attractiveness of colour photographs of the same woman’s face, laid out side by side.Using … Continue reading
The Suprise Winner Of Zimbabwe’s Got Talent ?
A Mr R Mugabe shockingly won the “Zimbabwe’s Got Talent” TV show at the weekend. Mr Mugabe attended the three week talent show along with thousands of others. Shockingly he managed to do away with the other contestants over a short period of time to take the prize. Who said Democracy hasn’t got a place … Continue reading
Cowell Stiffens At Viagra Deal
Young at heart Simon Cowell has confirmed that he was asked by the makers of Viagra to be the face of their new campaign. Mr Cowell 78, said upon hearing from his agent that Viagra offered to give him 1Milion for the deal, “That’s a bit stiff!” Company bosses confirmed that the rejected deal offered … Continue reading
THE RANK NEWS: spoof news and satire 