Doctor Poo : Christmas Special Gets The Gillian McKeith Treatment

  Obnoxious pretend doctor Gillian McKeith has announced that she has become a professional actress and that she is scheduled to make a shock appearance on our TV screens this Chrismas Day. The turd-obsessed charlatan, 51, who revived her flagging television career by appearing in the hit ITV reality  show  ‘I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out … Continue reading

Coalition To Tackle Deficit By Going On TV Gameshows

Following the surprising news that Business Secretary Vince Cable is to appear on the Christmas special edition of the hit BBC reality show Strictly Come Dancing, we can exclusively reveal that he is not the only government minister to try his luck at TV. We have received a copy of a Top Secret memo sent by … Continue reading

X Factor Wagner ‘Booted The Queen In The Face’ Say Tabloids

The runaway star of this year’s X Factor, Wagner Fiuza-Carrilho, is said to have “shocked his fellow finalists” by kicking Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II in the face, British tabloid newspapers claimed today.   The shock revelation follows several days of increasingly negative stories appearing in the popular press about the Brazilian singer. The latest claim is that the … Continue reading

Glenn Beck Finally Convinced by Theory of Evolution With Discovery Of “Half-Monkey, Half-Person”

Lachrymose Fox News presenter Glenn Beck has made a sensational U-Turn today on his claim that the theory of evolution was “ridiculous” because he had yet to see a “half-monkey, half-person” after he saw this amazing evidence on ESPN.

1 in 5 Americans now think Obama is a lesbian space werewolf

  A shocking survey today reveals that a staggering 1 in 5 Americans now believe that not only is President Obama not an American but that he is actually not even a heterosexual human Earthling.   The survey, undertaken by leading internet pollsters Poll-ari, was commissioned to investigate to what extent the American public believed … Continue reading

Desmond to rebrand Five as the Diana Channel

  Richard Desmond, the new owner of struggling TV network Channel Five, has today  announced his shock plan for saving the station. As from October 1st, British television’s fifth terrestrial channel will no longer be called Five but will instead be known as The Diana Channel.

This Much I Know: Martin Clunes, Actor / Comedian, 44, London

I knew I wanted be an actor when I was seven and played Joseph in the school nativity play. I didn’t fluff any of my lines and my parents took me out for ice cream at the end. Magic! People don’t appreciate how difficult it is to act well until they’ve seen really bad acting. … Continue reading

The World’s Best Remote Control !

Hilton Seeks New TV Best Friend :Search Is Over

Socialite Paris Hilton’s search for a new “best friend forever” for a forthcoming US reality TV show has ended. Twenty men and women had competed to be the 27-year-old’s new “BFF” (best friend forever) on the show, which will appear on MTV. Paris said in a press release, ” People say I am fickle and … Continue reading

Tv Crimes

BBC3 Kill It Cook It Eat It. Tonight Jeffrey Dammer takes us on a gourmet fest as he reviews his secret cook book. More 4: Hill Street Blues: Tonight former actor in the bill is released from hospital as a film crew follow discretely behind as he walks the streets confused. ITV2: Whose Line Is … Continue reading

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