Exclusive Photo Of Cher Lloyd Released After Her XFactor Exit
After coming in the bottom two twice during the contest tonight Cher Lloyd saw her X Factor dream come to an end as she was sent packing in the first part of the weekend’s final showdown. The 17-year-old hopeful from Malvern, Worcestershire, was the bookie’s favourite to face the chop tonight and, predictably, received … Continue reading
Rooney Backs X Factor’s Katie Waissel After News Of Her Gran’s Prices Are Announced
Wayne Rooney has confirmed he is backing Katie Waissel to win this years X Factor final after hearing that Katie’s 81-year-old maternal grandmother Sheila Vogel charges up to £250 per hour for sex through a website called Vintage Vamps. The Manchester United player who returned to Premiership football at the weekend after attending a fitness assessment … Continue reading
X Factor Wagner ‘Booted The Queen In The Face’ Say Tabloids
The runaway star of this year’s X Factor, Wagner Fiuza-Carrilho, is said to have “shocked his fellow finalists” by kicking Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II in the face, British tabloid newspapers claimed today. The shock revelation follows several days of increasingly negative stories appearing in the popular press about the Brazilian singer. The latest claim is that the … Continue reading
Manned One-Way Mission To Mars To Help America’s Future
NASA is planning an audacious mission to send the first manned spacecraft on a one-way mission to permanently settle on other planets. The ambitious idea is known as the Hundred Year Starship and will send astronauts to colonise planets like Mars knowing they could never come home. NASA Ames Director Ken Stott revealed that one … Continue reading
News In Pictures
A nation of misguided deluded fools were shocked yesterday to learn that the nations favourite Geordie Lass mimed on the X Factor. The gullible audience watched the 27-year-old take to the stage with black tape strapped around her legs and little else as she sang her new single. But rumours have been swirling that she sang … Continue reading
X Factor Joe Comes Out while Cowell goes Cruising
X Factor winner Joe McElderry is said to be elated at the overwhelmingly positive reaction from the public to his announcement last week that he is gay. The incandescent-toothed Geordie singer said he was “blown away” by the goodwill messages he has received both from fans and fellow celebrities alike, on his Twitter feed today. … Continue reading
THE RANK NEWS: spoof news and satire 