Mystery Bidder Pays 190 Grand for Diana Dress


 

A dress that marked the transformation of the lowly Lady Diana Spencer from a shy society girl to the consort of the future king, the Queen of Hearts, Patron Saint of the Daily Express and Saviour of the Universe has sold for £192,000.

The dress, which had been expected to sell for £50,000, was bought at auction in London by an anonymous bidder who, sources have revealed, only intends to keep the dress for a week.

It is not known to what use the mystery owner intends to put the dress for his sole week in possession but, according to Royal expert Obsequious Fawning, the secretive millionaire will, “after having his fun, then donate the dress to Our Lady Diana’s favourite charity, you know, the landmines thingy. Or was it the kiddies with AIDS one?”  

We asked leading fashion designer Jean-Paul Fabulous to sum up the impact of this awe-inspiring act of selfless generosity from beyond the grave. He eulogised:

“This finally proves what I have been saying for many years now, that those of us who spend obscene amounts of money on fine clothing and style do more good for humanity than the rest of you wretched serfs. I mean look at Mother Theresa. Who would buy that old washer-woman’s filthy rags in one of Elton’s charitable black tie and tiara balls?”

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