The Number Of Pixelated Faced Babies On The Increase


After an influx of celebrity babies being born with pixelated faces, top doctors both in America and Britain have joined forces to call for a clampdown on such illicit surgery.

“Children should be allowed to be seen without fear or prejudice” said top judge Ira Springsteen, “ but I have to admit if I ever happen to walk past one with a pixelated face I cannot stop myself from taking photographs of the little freaks.”

The number of celebrities being photographed by newspapers around the world has increased tenfold confirmed Dr Ken Stott of the New Mexico Research Unit.  “There was a time when children would have been seen out with their families without any problem but a trend has risen in which they are deliberately given cosmetic enhanced surgery in order for their faces not to be seen by the general public. Governments should be clamping down on this diabolical trend. As for the surgeons who blatantly provide this service to the rich and famous they should be struck off.”

One rumour that spread across the world was that a Z list celebrity had paid for a botched cheaper version of the Hollywood surgery. The wannabe starlet was seen running from her convertible into a local Netto supermarket near Wolverhampton high street when a photocopied card with a pixelated print on it fell from her child’s face to expose a normal face and various lumps of blu-tack. To the shock of the child’s mother no one at the store neither noticed nor cared as baked beans had just been reduced to one penny a tin.

A United Nations Council is being hastily called this evening to see if they can agree on a solution to this situation. Based on previous resolutions discussed by the U.N. it is looking unlikely indeed.

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  1. […] that build bitmap images and make them visible, but they’re also used to obscure – re-arranging faces and concealing sensitive details. A great example of this is their use in designs for modern […]



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